Archive for June, 2014

I choose me..

 

I read this today (if you want to click on the link to see the image, you can do that of course) but the content of this struck me (I will share it here):

 

“Most of my life has been spent trying to shrink myself. Trying to become smaller. Quieter. Less sensitive. Less opinionated. Less needy. Because I didn’t want to be a burden. I didn’t want to be too much or push people away.
I wanted people to like me. I wanted to be cared for and valued. I wanted to be wanted. So for years, I sacrificed myself for the sake of making other people happy. And for years, I suffered. But I’m tired of suffering, and I’m done shrinking. It’s not my job to change who I am in order to become someone else’s idea of a worthwhile human being. I am worthwhile. Not because other people think I am, but because I exist, and therefore I matter. My thoughts matter. My feelings matter. My voice matters. And with or without anyone’s permission or approval, I will continue to be who I am and speak my truth. Even if it makes people angry. Even if it makes them uncomfortable. Even if they choose to leave. I refuse to shrink. I choose to take up space. I choose honor my feelings. I choose to give myself permission to get my needs met. I choose me”
~Daniel Keopke.

I thought this was profound when I read it. As a nice former (key word) people pleaser who was raised on self sacrifice, generosity and giving of myself too often I forgot myself in that equation. When I reviewed my life I realized this as I was losing weight this past year.

I think that being giving, caring, loving and even a level of self sacrifice is good and even noble and a spiritual virtue but not at the cost of losing myself and who and what I am to myself. If I can’t do what I need for self care and self love I cannot love another truly. And if my goal is to love fully, deeply richly I have to rethink this I found. Too many times I overate in resentment because I was over extending my own limits and boundaries of what I truly wished to do (even with my generous heart) to the point of and almost toxic unhappiness. I stuffed it all down with sweets for the sweetness I really needed to give myself instead of the junk and sugars.

 

“To thine own self be true.” There is some truth in that.

To be true to myself (and thus to others) I have to give myself permission to explore my life, to exercise and to have and make the time to do that, to walk away from housework and not be perfect at the menial or unimportant details that clogged my days because I thought that was what I “THOUGHT” I was supposed to do. To insist with those who don’t find the temptations of high carb, high fat, sugar laden, wasted junk food calories an issue to understand I can’t have these things around me and I won’t. I won’t.

Respect is what I had to insist on to feel I deserved it and to reap the rewards. I have a husband I love dearly but he is thin, healthy as can be and can eat anything. He means well and did not realize fully what an impact certain foods had on me when they surrounded me each night. Chocolates, ice creams, popcorn, chips, sweets, etc etc until it added up to yet another 20 pounds on my frame. One night I looked him in the eye and said, “Do you want me to live?” and of course he said, “yes” but he balked at the idea of not having these things each night. I struck a compromise that did not compromise me. I told him there was a long list of snack foods that he liked (but I did not) that I had no problem with and that he could eat anything in his shop or somewhere where I didn’t see him at any time. He mentioned the word, “will power” and at that point I was sure it was going to be war (but one I would mount for my life and my well being). After all, wouldn’t I fight hard for someone I love (even if I didn’t know her well yet?). I told him this. (I hate to fight.) Somehow when I insisted it mattered.

I felt in this small step and the hundreds since then (over 118 pounds ago) that I have more worth, more happiness, more love, more giving and more joy in the quality of my own life.  It’s richness has increased and I am sure those around me feel it. But even if they didn’t….

I choose me. I choose me.

 

 

Advertisements

Pecan Rum Cupcake Recipe | All Day I Dream About Food.

 

This is a great recipe, low carb and delicious! I wanted to share! (copied from above link) I was craving something small but sweet and since I am sticking with healthy and very low carb this is great!

 

Mini Rum Pecan Cupcakes with Cream Cheese Frosting

Cupcakes:
1 cup almond flour
1 cup pecans, ground fine
1/4 cup unflavoured whey protein powder
1 tsp baking powder
3/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
6 tbsp butter, softened
1/3 cup granulated erythritol
2 large eggs
1/2 tsp vanilla
15 drops stevia extract
3 tbsp dark rum
2 tbsp almond milk
1/2 cup chopped, toasted pecans

Frosting:
8 oz cream cheese, softened
1/4 cup powdered erythritol
1/4 cup whipping cream
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
20 drops stevia extract

For the cupcakes, preheat oven to 325F and line a mini-cupcake pan with paper liners (you may have left over batter and have to do two batches.  I got 28 mini-cupcakes).

In a medium bowl whisk together almond flour, ground pecans, whey protein, baking powder, baking soda, and salt.  In a large bowl, beat butter and erythritol until well combined.   Beat in eggs one at a time, then beat in vanilla and stevia extract, scraping down beaters and sides of bowl as needed.

Add half of the almond mixture and beat well, then add rum and almond milk.  Add remaining almond flour mixture and beat until well combined.  Stir in chopped pecans.  Divide batter among prepared cupcake tins and bake 15 to 18 minutes or until tops are golden brown and a tester inserted in the center comes out clean.  Let cool in pan.

For the frosting, beat cream cheese, powdered erythritol, whipping cream, vanilla extract and stevia extract together until smooth.  Pipe or spread onto cooled cupcakes.

Makes 28.  Each mini cupcake has a total of 2 g of carbs and .7 g of fiber.  Total NET CARBS = 1.3 g.  But you WILL want to eat more than one at a time!!!
Read more at http://alldayidreamaboutfood.com/2012/03/mini-rum-pecan-cupcakes-low-carb-and-gluten-free.html#Y9r2b8YrwG33bHFD.99

Image

 

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/02/08/dining/mindful-eating-as-food-for-thought.html?pagewanted=all

I wanted to write about Mindful Eating and ran into the article in The New York Times that says so much to me and thought I would share…

 

So what is “mindful eating”? It is a zen/buddhist or like zen practice of being fully away of eat bite of food you eat. Chewing slowly, savoring the bite and having little distractions while you do so(except soft music or maybe a light conversation).

Anyways, it has been on my mind for about a few months to write on this topic. I have been in a lifelong struggle with good eating habits. I am not alone as it seems like there are more books out there on diets than there are on topics like this that support maintenance and healthy nutritional eating habits.

 

In the old days and when I relapse into bad behaviors and choices, this is one that rears its head for me. (Watching TV and eating dinner or any other meal for that matter. Ever sit in front of the TV munching away and are not even aware of how much you have eaten? Me too, or used to be me…)

When I sit down at the table, eat slowly and taste things with relish as opposed to gulping it down in a hurry because I am on the run or worse, because I have waited to long to eat and “feel” like I am starving, I overeat. Always always make bad choices. When I savor the food, actually chew it, enjoy it and relish it for its taste and nutritional beauty as nourishment for my body, I do much better with weight loss and weight maintenance. I was often not aware of what I ate, how it tasted or how MUCH I ate because I barely even chewed it.

I am down 109 pounds now, that’s a lot and this is one of those things that made me NOT feel like I was starving. When I grab something on the go, shove it down my throat as quickly as possible while talking on the phone, or driving or 100 thousand other things, especially television, am I indeed nourishing ALL my senses and feeding my being? No, I am not and suspect if you are reading this and nodding your head (and trying to find inspiration on how NOT to regain weight, how to be successful and to not feel like you are deprived), this is probably and issue with you too.

I want to add something for GREAT TIPS  I read on Huffington Post written by Jenni Grover at the  Mother Nature Network. The link is here http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/11/12/mindful-eating-tips_n_3941528.html and this is a great excerpt from that article on Five Tips to Eat Mindfully:

Here are some of my favorite tips to introduce mindfulness to mealtimes in an easy, accessible fashion.

Eat slower
Eating slowly doesn’t have to mean taking it to extremes. Still, it’s a good idea to remind yourself, and your family, that eating is not a race. Taking the time to savor and enjoy your food is one of the healthiest things you can do. You are more likely to notice when you are full, you’ll chew your food more and hence digest it more easily, and you’ll probably find yourself noticing flavors you might otherwise have missed. If you have young children, why not try making a game of it — who can chew their food the longest? Or you could introduce eating with chopsticks as a fun way to slow things down.

Savor the silence
Yes, eating in complete silence may be impossible for a family with children, but you might still encourage some quiet time and reflection. Again, try introducing the idea as a game — “let’s see if we can eat for two minutes without talking” — or suggesting that one meal a week be enjoyed in relative silence. If the family mealtime is too important an opportunity for conversation to pass up, then consider introducing a quiet meal or snack time into your day when you can enjoy it alone. The NYT article, for example, noted that one dietitian simply savors a few sips of tea in complete silence when she is too busy for a complete mindful meal.

Silence the phone. Shut off the TV.
Our daily lives are full of distractions, and it’s not uncommon for families to eat with the TV blaring or one family member or other fiddling with their iPhone. Consider making family mealtime, which should, of course, be eaten together, an electronics-free zone. I’m not saying you should never eat pizza in front of the TV, but that too should be a conscious choice that marks the exception, not the norm.

Pay attention to flavor
The tanginess of a lemon, the spicyness of arugula, the crunch of a pizza crust — paying attention to the details of our food can be a great way to start eating mindfully. After all, when you eat on the go or wolf down your meals in five minutes, it can be hard to notice what you are even eating, let alone truly savor all the different sensations of eating it. If you are trying to introduce mindful eating to your family, consider talking more about the flavors and textures of food. Ask your kids what the avocado tastes like, or how the hummus feels. And be sure to share your own observations and opinions too. (Yes, this goes against the eating in silence piece, but you don’t have to do everything at once.)

Know your food
Mindfulness is really about rekindling a relationship with our food. From planting a veggie garden through baking bread to visiting a farmers market, many of the things we locavores have been preaching about for years are not just ways to cut our carbon foodprint, but also connect with the story behind our food. Even when you have no idea where the food you are eating has come from, try asking yourself some questions about the possibilities: Who grew this? How? Where did it come from? How did it get here? Chances are, you’ll not only gain a deeper appreciation for your food, but you’ll find your shopping habits changing in the process too.

Like I say, mindful eating does not have to be an exercise in super-human concentration, but rather a simple commitment to appreciating, respecting and, above all, enjoying the food you eat every day. It can be practiced with salad or ice cream, donuts or tofu, and you can introduce it at home, at work, or even as you snack on the go (though you may find yourself doing this less often).

And while the focus becomes how you eat, not what you eat, you may find your notions of what you want to eat shifting dramatically for the better too.

Thought I would share this today and to remind ME when I need it, what worked for me……